June 09, 2009

Becoming a Man of God

My firstborn will turn sixteen this weekend. We’re having a big party to celebrate this milestone in her life, and there will be a great group of guys and girls at the party to help us celebrate. We are so blessed to have quality young people for our children to befriend! I really like these young people a lot, and as the mom of two teenage daughters, I’m a little fussy about the company they keep.

Of course, there are those budding romances around this age, and it’s fun to watch, but scary, too! One never knows whether these young people have found their potential mate, or just a really good friend who happens to be the opposite gender. And that means that I don’t know if my daughters have already met the guy they’ll one day marry. So, here’s an open letter to all the guys I already know, including any who I may one day affectionately refer to as “son.” Even though some of you may not have an ideal home, apply the general principles to your own life:


Treat your mom with the same consideration you would give to your “sweetheart.” A college professor of mine used to say, “Gals, if you want to see how your future mate will treat you, watch the way he treats his mom.” Make sure you tell her often how beautiful she is, and how glad you are that she is your mom. Leave her little notes, sincere ones, that highlight a special quality you appreciate about her. Tell her how her love has made your life so much different from what it could be if she weren’t in your life. Make sure you give her the highest honor of all women—she lovingly cares for you each day.”


Show honor and respect for your dad. Treat him the way you would want your own kids to treat you. My husband used to tell me, “You start training your kids twenty years before they're born.” That’s because your character will have the biggest influence on your kids. Think now about what kind of young man you hope to raise some day, then be that kind of young man to your dad.


Be completely honest in your relationship with your parents. Build a relationship of trust. You won’t be able to convince your future mate that you are trustworthy if your own parents can’t trust you.


Obey your parents, even when it’s hard. Make obedience your passion. This will be one thing a godly woman will look for in you. If you have the habit of obeying your parents, you will likely also be a man who obeys God, even when it’s hard. This means you will make a great leader, and that’s a really attractive thing in a guy.


Don’t try to grow up too fast. You will have many years as an adult, but only a few more years to be a “kid.” You will have the responsibilities that come with adulthood soon enough—don’t even “try them out.” Enjoy where you are now, and be all there. Don’t chase after “tomorrow” or pine away for the “freedom” you’ll have as an adult. Honor God every moment, and your life will be full, even if “tomorrow” never comes.


Although the world says that “opposites attract,” the reality is that “birds of a feather flock together.” You attract the kind of people you are yourself. If you want godly friends, be a godly guy. If you are, even your unsaved friends will respect you. They may not let you know it, but deep down inside, they will wish they were like you.


Chase after godliness the way you chase after a soccer ball in the championship game. Make it your focus. Run hard after it, and don’t let up. Then, not only will you please the people around you, but you will also be able to look forward to hearing God say, “Well done, good and faithful servant!” No trophy could compare with that moment!!


Spend time becoming “the friend of God.” Get to know what God thinks better than you know what your friends think. Then you won’t be confused by the “logic” of this world. You will have an understanding of what the will of God is, and you will have the strength to do it.


And don’t forget to check in with me in a few years to let me know what God has been doing in your lives. I have no greater joy than to know that my children (in the Lord) walk in the truth.

Mama Fuller


  1. This was such an inspiring letter, I must say. I know many men, (or men to be) who I would love to share this letter with. If all men loved God with such a passion, and acted as instructed by this letter, then we would have many great men indeed. Thank you for sharing this with me.

  2. You are welcome. The party was a smash hit, and I was so contented last night when it was over. These kids are easily the most honorable young men and women I've ever met, and I am so privileged to be in their company! I cannot wait to see what God is going to make of their lives in the coming years.


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